Open Letter to the Keeper of the Blog

Dear Blogspot,
I wrote a blog about someone crabbing off a pier into the Hudson late last week. Now all the ads on my blog are about crabbing. My blog is not about crabbing, my blog is about peace, harmony, and the American way. My blog is about the little things, and the little people. I am trying to offer a virtual piece of heaven that allows others to escape their lives and become part of mine - which is so totally exciting and filled with mystery and adventure. I keep telling people, "I'm not writing this blog for my health." I'm writing this blog to pay the mortgage, put food on the table each night for my family, and raise enough money to buy a motorcycle. I can keep playing Texas Hold 'Em on my cell phone for fake money, or I can write my blog each day and attract people to read about silly happenings with interesting ads. I know my audience and I know no one cares about crabs, crabbing, or crab fishermen.

Sig from "Deadliest Catch" is not subscribing to my blog because he respects my opinion on the best way to catch Opilio or Alaskan Kings. I have tried for several days now to change the ads that are generated through keywords - yesterday I analyzed, researched, and wrote about the pounds of hotdogs American's eat each year and a lawsuit against "Big Hotdog". How about a couple of ads about some all-beef franks or Jacoby & Meyers? Blogspot, you are forcing me into a corner and it is time I begin playing your game. You want keywords, I will give you 50 instances of the same phrase…

Lime In The Coconut
Lime in the coconut, lime in the coconut, lime in the coconut, lime in the coconut, lime in the coconut, lime in the coconut, lime in the coconut, lime in the coconut, lime in the coconut, lime in the coconut, lime in the coconut, lime in the coconut, lime in the coconut, lime in the coconut, lime in the coconut, lime in the coconut, lime in the coconut, lime in the coconut, lime in the coconut, lime in the coconut, lime in the coconut, lime in the coconut, lime in the coconut, lime in the coconut, lime in the coconut, lime in the coconut, lime in the coconut, lime in the coconut, lime in the coconut, lime in the coconut, lime in the coconut, lime in the coconut, lime in the coconut, lime in the coconut, lime in the coconut, lime in the coconut, lime in the coconut, lime in the coconut, lime in the coconut, lime in the coconut, lime in the coconut, lime in the coconut, lime in the coconut, lime in the coconut, lime in the coconut, lime in the coconut, lime in the coconut, lime in the coconut, lime in the coconut, lime in the coconut.

I don't know what this will do for my ads - but like I've said before I am a man of science, and we are performing an experiment. Safety goggles on people…these ads might take you to places you've never been before.

PTFP: 7 in. - this is ridiculous