Blog You Like An Animal

"It's at times like this the great heaven knows that we wish we had not so many clothes" sang Adam Ant in the 1980's in his hit "Strip". I heard this song on my way into work this morning and started thinking about the ramifications of wearing less clothing as Adam suggests occurred during "ancient history". For one, it's getting colder now and nobody looks good naked and shivering - trust me, been there done that. Secondly, we're a fat bunch of people. Between 1962 and the year 2000, the number of obese Americans has grown from 13% to 31%. There are 3.8 million people over 300 pounds and 400,000 Americans weigh 400 pounds or more.

Imagine them in less clothing Adam. I don't know how folks looked in the 80's, but this song would not be the anthem for 2008. Don't believe me? Conduct the informal survey I did this morning. I looked around the train car I was on and thought, "would that person look good with less clothing or not". The participants were unaware of this analysis - kind of like exchanging their "normal coffee for Folgers crystals". The results? There was one dude that I thought would be ok with wearing less clothes. He looked like he worked out and in fact, he was reading a book entitled, "Deadly Karate Blows" available from Amazon.com. Now, I am happily married and in order for this analysis to be thoughtful I had to be unbiased - even if it meant considering dudes. I'm not suggesting the guy was "hot", I'm just saying he wasn't obese.

I thought about telling him about my conclusion, but then thought better of it based on his choice of reading material. It was at that moment that I realized that not only could that guy go ahead with wearing less, but he might be the smartest commuter ever. The trains are packed each morning and people act like a bunch of animals. Very often your pelvis is in touch with about 5 other pelvis' or mid-sections depending on your height. But this guy? He had no one within a one-foot radius of him. You don't lay a pelvis on a dude reading "Deadly Karate Blows".

When I arrived at work I immediately went to barnesandnoble.com and invested in my new commuting book - "How To Put An Animal Down Without Using The Gun You Already Own". I will keep you posted on my commute.